Santa and Nana Claus, thanks so much for going the extra mile and being so patient with Dominic. It meant so much to me!!
Saturday, December 23, 2017
Thanks for Going the Extra Mile
Two
weeks ago, I helped host a Special Needs Holiday Party. I had Santa
and Nana Claus lined up to make their appearance about 3 p.m. I had told
Dominic that they were coming ahead of time, but since I have never taken him
in the past to see them, I was a little apprehensive how he would
act. I took Lauren to see Santa a handful of times when she was little, but I guess I
thought that Dominic wouldn't be able to handle it, so I never even
attempted it. When Santa and Nana arrived, I went over to them and
introduced myself because I had never met them in person, we had only
corresponded by e-mail. They were so sweet and were circulating around
the tables talking to everybody. When Dominic saw them, he decided to get as far as he
could away from them. We had a large group and there were many
that wanted to sit on Santa's lap. I was busy taking pictures and every
so often, I would look over and Dominic was still on the other side of
the room. I explained to Santa that I didn't want to push Dominic too
much to sit on his lap because when he's really stressed he is more
prone to seizures. As the party started to wind down, Nana Claus was
able to coax Dominic over to where she and Santa were. She put a chair
about 10 feet in front of them and got Dominic to sit down. The whole
time she was explaining what she was doing. She and Santa were finally
able to get just a few feet behind Dominic and I was able to get a
picture!
Santa and Nana Claus, thanks so much for going the extra mile and being so patient with Dominic. It meant so much to me!!
Santa and Nana Claus, thanks so much for going the extra mile and being so patient with Dominic. It meant so much to me!!
Thursday, December 7, 2017
I'm Proud of You, Dad
My dad will be 83 in March. I know that I won't have him or my mom forever. The talk is at 2 p.m. today and I so wish I could be there. A few weeks ago, he did the next best thing, he read it to me over the phone. Since his stroke, he talks slower, but that's fine. I have to say, his talk was really interesting! He stopped every so often and said "you're probably bored." I told him I wasn't . When he got done, I told him that I was proud of him. It took a lot for him to go out of his "comfort zone," and I recognize that. Last night, I wished him good luck. I know that my dad will do great and I can't wait to hear all about it when I talk to him tonight!! I love you dad.
Thursday, November 30, 2017
It's Never "Okay"
It seems like almost daily, another man is accused of sexual harassment, etc. I can't
even keep track of it. It's like a lid has been pulled off a boiling pot and all the men
accused are spilling out. What would have happened if all that stuff hadn't come out
about Harvey Weinstein?
How long would have all those men been kept in the "boiling pot?" I think
the individuals coming forward are very brave and it makes me sad that they felt their
voices were not heard for so long or that they kept it inside for years and sometimes
decades. I told my dad
recently about my "#MeToo" moment. I thought I had told him before, but
evidently I hadn't. Anyways, in the late 1980's into the early 1990's I worked for a very
small company as a receptionist. I was told by the owner of the company I had to always
wear panty hose and a skirt/dress. I did it because I liked the job and the people I
worked with. After I had been there a few years, the owner hired an older gentleman. He
was easily three times my age. On more than one occasion, he made comments about my
figure and how I looked in my clothes. It made me more than a little uncomfortable and I
talked to the owner of the company privately. His response, "if you take him to
court, I would be on his side." I can still remember his words this many years
later. When I finished telling my dad the whole story he said something along the lines
of, "I can't say that I'm surprised, that's the way it was back then." Excuse
me?? It's never okay for that type of thing to be going on in the workplace. My
experience sounds tame compared to the stories I've seen and heard in the news. After I
moved on from that job, I took a night class at the local college. I had a professor that
would come and stand behind me just a little bit too close. This happened so many times
that I eventually dropped the class. I had passed the point of being able to get a
refund, but I had to get out of the class for my own mental well being. I had actually
forgot about that professor until all of these stories starting coming out in the news.
Many of the accused men claim they are "sorry." Are they really sincere or are
they "sorry" they got caught???? Time will tell.
Thursday, November 9, 2017
The "Ladies"
Dominic has been going to music therapy for a while at the Michigan State University Community Music School. During his half hour session, I sit in the lobby area along with other parents/caregivers. There are a handful of tables and chairs and most people either read, use their computers and/or chat with the others at their table. Each Wednesday afternoon, when I came into the lobby, I noticed a table of four ladies all older than me, chit chatting. They seemed to know each other VERY well. They all had special needs adult children/grandchildren that were also participating in music therapy. I would overhear them talking about topics that I was very interested in, but all the chairs were taken and I didn't want to be nosy, pull up a chair and just plop myself down and interrupt. One day about a year or so ago, one of the ladies didn't show up, so there was an empty seat. I had been bringing my sheet of disability ministry events and knew at some point, I would go over and talk to them. This was my opportunity and I grabbed it! I went over and sat down and told them about the ministry. They were the nicest, sweetest and kindest women! Over the past year, I have gotten to know the three ladies and we have shared so much with each other. When I told them about my Cancer in January, they prayed for me. When one of the ladies and her daughter needed a ride home from a recent doctor appointment, I helped her out. This trio of ladies have become like Dominic's "surrogate," grandmas. They have become my friends. It has been an incredibly eye-opening experience to listen to the ladies talk about their experiences as caregivers. The half hour goes by very quickly and usually I'm not done yakking when Dominic is finished!!! Last week, I didn't bring Dominic to music therapy because I didn't feel well. Yesterday, the ladies were all asking where I was. It's nice to be missed!!!
Monday, October 16, 2017
The E-mail Every Special Needs Parent Hopes to Receive For Their Child
It doesn't really bother Dominic and I, but at the same time, I feel it would be good for him socially to be around kids his own age. I think it's a common thought for special needs parents. Anyways, Dominic's IEP went well and I mentioned it would be great for Dominic to get more socialization. The others at the IEP, which included his teacher, speech therapist, social worker, etc. assured me that he was around other kids frequently during the school day. I asked about what would happen next year. They told me he would be heading to the high school and there would even be more chances for Dominic to be around typically-developing and special needs peers. That put my mind at ease. Imagine my surprise and delight, when I checked my emails after the IEP and found this message from a mom I had met during Dominic's last swimming class this past Tuesday:
Hello Cathy,
It was nice meeting you earlier this
week. I always appreciate a positive connection with another mom
especially one who probably shares a similar day as I do! Anyways, I just wanted to say hello and reach out to see if you
would like to join me and my son for a Mom/son play date sometime?
Sunday, September 17, 2017
An Unexpected "Opportunity"
When Dominic was a toddler, I would take him to music classes and he would cover his ears or bury himself in my lap because it was so overwhelming. Never in my wildest dreams did I think he would go from that to wanting to play the piano!! Dominic has been getting music therapy from the Michigan State University Community Music School for several years and each of the four music therapists that he has had have each taught him something different. He has "sampled" different musical instruments and now primarily plays the keyboard and/or piano during his once a week therapy session. Last year, when we learned of his high interest in playing the piano, we sought out a used one. We found one that was "free" and only paid to transport it. This past summer, he refused to play every time I "told" him to. I realized I had to "ask" him! Good grief. Dominic doesn't read music, he plays by memory. Anyways, flash forward to this coming Wednesday. Two of the non-profit organizations I am affiliated with are joining together to sponsor a music event in the evening. Last Wednesday, his music therapist handed me a sheet of paper listing the songs and order of everything for the joint music event. I noticed Dominic's name was next to five of the songs. She told me he would be accompanying on the piano!! What an incredible and unexpected opportunity for Dominic. This afternoon, I reminded him about Wednesday and asked him to practice, then handed him the sheet with the songs. He has been playing for a couple hours already!! We are expecting a big group on Wednesday night, so I hope he doesn't get "stage fright!!!!"
Saturday, September 2, 2017
The Moment I Realized Routine Appointments to the Dermatologist Will Never Be "Typical," As A Skin Cancer Survivor
I had my first dermatology appointment since my March surgery on August 14. It was recommended to me that I go every six months the first three years after my surgery and then yearly. I went into the appointment thinking everything was fine, I would be in and out quickly and I would have plenty of time to do some shopping! The gal that I had at the dermatology office, examined me quite thoroughly, asked me a bunch of questions and then started circling moles! Hmm, I knew that wasn't a good sign. In that moment, I realized my routine appointments to the dermatologist will never be "typical." She began telling me, "you do know that since you had malignant melanoma once, you are at a higher risk to get it again and for the cancer to metastasize, don't you?" I knew I was at a higher risk to get malignant melanoma again, I didn't know about the metastasize part. She said, "I need to do two biopsies, you have some moles that I would rather have in a jar than on you." Um, okay. She then said, "I will have the results for you in two weeks." I went and made an appointment with the receptionist and then drove home. I wasn't in any mood to do any shopping by then. The hubby and Lauren both asked me how it went when I got home, so I explained everything to them. Once again, for the second time this year, I had to tell my elderly parents that I may need cancer surgery. I felt so awful at the thought of putting them through that again. I spent the next 15 days keeping extremely busy to try to keep my mind off of what the results might show. It was incredibly difficult to wait that long. Anytime my mind wandered and I started thinking about it too much, I got a feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach. The hubby was off last week from work and he came along with me to my appointment. Luckily, both biopsies were negative. Whew! The sun and I have a totally different "relationship," now. When I mow the lawn, I put SPF 50 on the parts not covered up and I wear sunglasses. When I sit on our deck, I put up the umbrella if I don't have sunblock on. I wear sunblock when I know I will be in the car driving around a lot. My hubby and I are doing monthly skin checks on each other, it's on our family calendar in black marker! I have learned two important things since this cancer journey started in January. One is, I have an incredible and large support system. Two, I am not at all embarrassed or self-conscious to have my 3 1/2 inch scar visible in public. It shows I am a "survivor."
Friday, August 11, 2017
What Does the Future Hold?
This past Wednesday, Dominic and I
went to the Kroger to do some grocery shopping. He has become very helpful and
I continue to use our Kroger outings as educational "field trips." He
uses different skills such as problem solving, following directions and one of
the most important ones, PATIENCE !! The past couple of times we have gone
to Kroger, after we load up the van with our groceries, I have let Dominic take
the empty cart back to the cart "corral." He usually walks right back
to the van without incident. Not this time. He decided to run into the parking
lot. I immediately yelled, "Dominic, get back here! You know better than
that!" I was angry, but remained calm after he got in the car and we
headed back home. I told him at least three times to never do that again .
Hopefully, he "received," my message loud and clear. Will there ever
come a day when I don't have to keep my Autism "radar," up?? As he has gotten older, I have been trying to give
him more independence, like getting the newspaper and the mail from the boxes
at the end of our driveway. It may seem like a small thing, but when he was
younger, he would run into the street, not caring if cars were coming. When
Dominic was really little, like two or so, he picked up a steak knife from the
kitchen counter while I had my back turned for a few seconds and put the entire
blade down his throat. He has gone from that to setting the table for us each
night. I have worked with him to remember steak knives always have the blades
down. Only in the past year, have I let him set the table when steak knives
are involved, for good reason! I had someone tell me a while back that I
should start looking for a group home/facility for Dominic. He was
like 10 or 11 at the time! He turned 13 about three weeks ago and I have been
thinking more and more about his future. I have an extra layer of
overprotectiveness because Dominic has Epilepsy and he just had a seizure six
days ago. It had been almost 8 months. Sigh. Earlier this
year, I had surgery to remove cancer from my leg. Waiting five days to find out
if my cancer had spread was incredibly difficult. Thank goodness it hadn't!! I thought A LOT during those five days about Dominic and how he would handle it if I was not going to going to be around. My husband will be 65 in November and I turned 54 about a month ago. We are not
young parents. Couples our age have grandchildren Dominic's age!! I know
grandparents raising their special needs grandchildren . We may never have an
"empty nest," and I am okay with that. Dominic turning 13 seemed to come quick!! In five years, he will be 18 and an
adult. He is fascinated with puzzles and putting things together.
Will he be an electrical engineer like my brother? If I think too much
about the future then I miss out on the present. I take each day as it comes and continue to give Dominic more and more chances to become independent. Shouldn't that be my goal?
Friday, August 4, 2017
How Kathy Bates Helped Me Come to Terms With My Lymphedema
I have always admired Kathy Bates for her amazing acting ability, but when I heard her speak out about her experiences with lymphedema
recently, it made me
admire her even more!!! I found a video from when she was on the show,
"The Doctors," where she shared her story about living daily with lymphedema. As I listened to her, I realized many of her experiences were similar to mine and it made me feel a lot less alone. I noticed swelling in my calf and
particularly in my foot shortly after my operation for my Stage 1B Malignant Melanoma in
March of this year. As the weeks went by and I continued to recover and slowly return to
"normal," I remember thinking to myself, "why is my thigh, knee, calf and foot so swollen?" "The surgical oncologist only removed two lymph nodes
from my groin." I decided to make an appointment at the beginning of May at the Melanoma Clinic and discuss
the swelling with them in person . The gal I saw there told me I had lymphedema and to
order a "compression garment," which I did. I received no guidance on how to
use it, when to wear it, etc. The handful of times I did attempt to wear it, the circulation in my ankle was getting cut off and my ankle had a bright red ring around
it!! Towards the end of May, I called the Melanoma Clinic again and made another
appointment. At that appointment, I was referred to a lymphedema "clinic." There, I
was evaluated and started a four week physical therapy program. My left leg was by then,
38 percent larger than my right. I was starting to lose the range of motion in my foot.
My treatment was pretty aggressive. It involved wearing nine total compression bandages
for up to 18 hours a day!!
I also have fibrosis in my foot, which is scar tissue. I finished therapy yesterday and will need to continue wearing my bandages until my custom made compression garment is made and sent to me, which is going to be 2-3 weeks. Before my physical therapy ended, I asked my therapist if my lymphedema is permanent and a life long condition. She told me that it was. I applaud Kathy Bates for using her celebrity status to bring awareness to a little known condition that 10 million people in the United States struggle with. I may not be a celebrity or live in Hollywood, but when I get comments when I am out in public with all my compression bandages on, I use it as an opportunity to educate others about lymphedema!!
I also have fibrosis in my foot, which is scar tissue. I finished therapy yesterday and will need to continue wearing my bandages until my custom made compression garment is made and sent to me, which is going to be 2-3 weeks. Before my physical therapy ended, I asked my therapist if my lymphedema is permanent and a life long condition. She told me that it was. I applaud Kathy Bates for using her celebrity status to bring awareness to a little known condition that 10 million people in the United States struggle with. I may not be a celebrity or live in Hollywood, but when I get comments when I am out in public with all my compression bandages on, I use it as an opportunity to educate others about lymphedema!!
Tuesday, July 11, 2017
Taking a Step into Dominic's "World"
According to the Interactive Autism Network, A Partnership of the Kennedy Krieger Institute and the
Simons Foundation:
"many individuals on the autism spectrum exhibit some form of repetitive motor behavior. Just as they may speak a word or phrase over and over again (echolalia), or even just utter the same sound repeatedly, they may flap their hands, flick their fingers, bang their heads, grind their teeth, or endlessly perform other seemingly random physical acts. The psychiatric term for this is stereotypy, but these actions are more often referred to as “repetitive behaviors” or “stimming” – which is short for self-stimulation."
We learned a long time ago that when Dominic is over stimulated, he will retreat into his "world" of repeating parts of videos and television shows/commercials (referred to as "scripting") as a coping mechanism. When we were in Maryland last week on vacation, we stayed with our close friends who have always owned a cat.
This is how Dominic prefers to observe cats, when there is glass separating him. To Dominic and the cats credit, the two of them managed to co-exist relatively harmoniously. When we went to another friends apartment and he noticed a cat hanging out in her bed in the living room, he screamed, started walking in circles and then began non-stop scripting. I think because he hadn't noticed the cat when we first got there. Dominic went back to summer school yesterday after a week off. Monday, I heard him repeating an old Barney Christmas video. Yesterday afternoon it was a commercial, "just two pills, all day strong, all day long." As the week goes on, the stimming will decrease as he gets back to his routine, but never really goes away completely. Over the years, we have developed a few phrases to get him to stop when we feel he has visited the stimming world for a little too long. Last night, Dominic was reciting part of Thomas the Train. Well, it had been awhile since he had been there!
Monday, June 12, 2017
Thank You for Paving the Way
One of the most important things I have learned the longer I "travel," down this Autism "road," is that you need the support of a mom that has racked up a few more "miles," than you!! I met my friend, Mary, and in turn, her adult son, when I became a Board member of the Mid-Michigan Autism Association almost two years ago. It took us just a short amount of time before we really bonded. Her son is more than twice Dominic's age, but their personalities are very similar. Dominic is absolutely terrified of taking a shower, but Mary told me a while back about using a brush on his back to mimic the way the water will feel, so I know this will be the summer Dominic learns to take a shower!! Thank you Mary. When Dominic had his first seizure and I found out her son had experienced them too, I felt even more bonded with her, she knows exactly how that feels. Thank you Mary. This past weekend, I asked when she let her son go into a men's restroom by himself, mainly because I had a very negative experience recently taking Dominic into the women's restroom. Mary told me she first let her son go by himself at 10 years old, but stood right by the door. Well, this weekend, when I knew the men's restroom was empty, I let Dominic venture in by himself, but I stood right by the door! Thank you Mary. Back in April, we "manned," an information table at a local 5K Race together.
Thank you, Mary. Her son has "aged," out of the school system and ever since we met, she has voiced her concern about what would happen after that. When she told me that he was offered a part-time job, I was ecstatic!!!!! Hearing that awesome news, gives me hope that Dominic will be able to get a job when he too "ages," out of the school system. Thank you Mary for paving the way for me on this Autism "road.".
Thursday, April 13, 2017
It Wasn't My "Time"
Now that it has been a little over a month since my cancer surgery, I have had time to reflect on the entire experience. From the time I found out I had skin cancer in January until right now, I haven't cried. I think that was because I was trying to convince everyone else that I was going to be fine!! One of the very hardest things I have ever had to do was to continue to tell Dominic I would be okay, even though I really didn't know.
It was difficult for Lauren, because she was at college and couldn't come home. My husband was so strong through all of this. He never for a moment was negative. He kept everything positive the entire time. I relied on my faith enormously. I told three priests about my cancer and one of them anointed me with oil. The feeling of calmness after he did that was incredibly powerful. When things are out of your control, sometimes the only thing you can do is pray. The amount of support I received from my family and friends was tremendous! I had so many people reach out to me, both publicly and privately that I realized I am very blessed to have such a huge support system. I told a lot of people about my diagnosis, not because I wanted to be the center of attention, but rather if just one person gets a full body exam to look for suspicious moles, then everything I went through was worth it. Malignant Melanoma is a very serious and deadly cancer. I have had people tell me I am "lucky." I have to 100% agree with that. I am lucky that the cancer was caught early. I am lucky that it hadn't spread. I was extremely lucky I only had to drive one hour to receive treatment. I had reconciled in my own head that if I was going to die, I was ready to go. Thank goodness it wasn't my "time." About a year and half ago, my dad had a massive stroke. He and I have had lots of discussions about what he went through and what I just went through and how it was similar. He came up with one word that describes what are lives are now. That word is "gift." We have been given the "gift," of extra time. That is something no one should ever take for granted.
Tuesday, March 14, 2017
"Sliding" into Independence
We returned this past Sunday night from a one week vacation to our favorite resort in Jamaica. This particular resort has several pools and we like to hang out by the pool specifically designed for kids. One of the most popular things to do is to go down the giant water slides.
Okay, a little background on the water slides. Two years ago, when we were at this resort, Dominic and I almost drowned at the foot of the slides. We had went over to be able to greet Lauren as she came down, not realizing how deep it was. The lifeguard had to jump in and pull us to the surface. SCARY. That incident was the number one reason I enrolled Dominic in swimming lessons shortly after we returned home. Anyways, last Friday, (the day before we left), Dominic and I headed over to watch Lauren come down. She had asked several times throughout the week if Dominic could go down the slides. Each time I said no. I hadn't thought of asking Dominic until we watched Lauren. To my surprise, he said yes! Okay, now I had a decision to make. Do I let my fear hold him back or do I let him try? Lauren promised me she would be with him the whole time. The lifeguard was also sitting within a foot of the bottom of the slides, so there was not a chance he would drown. I let him go. He came down the slide with no problems at all! When they came over to see me, Lauren asked him if he wanted to go again. He said YES! They went down a few more times.
Even now, with Dominic turning 13 in about four months, I am still guilty of underestimating his abilities. My husband and Lauren have to remind me! I don't know why I still assume he can't do something. Trying is a part of learning, right? I think it's my inner "mamma bear " instincts of wanting to protect my "cubs." I was the "playground police," when Lauren was little to make sure she always got her turn on the swings, etc. Good grief. Looking back, I was pretty overprotective!!! Lauren will be 21 in a few months. As I have watched her grow into an independent and self-confident woman, our relationship has evolved and changed. Ever so often, I catch myself going into that overprotective "mode" with her. Does that feeling of wanting to protect our children ever go away? I am 53 and my dad is still over protective of me, so I guess I just answered my own question!! As Dominic continues to mature and become more independent, I need to loosen those restrictions I don't mean to place on him. I have already taught him what to say to me when I bug him too much. He says, "please just leave me alone." I'm glad he can recognize those times when those pre-adolescent feelings kick in! My relationship with Dominic is starting to change and evolve, just like Lauren and I need to change with it, right???
Okay, a little background on the water slides. Two years ago, when we were at this resort, Dominic and I almost drowned at the foot of the slides. We had went over to be able to greet Lauren as she came down, not realizing how deep it was. The lifeguard had to jump in and pull us to the surface. SCARY. That incident was the number one reason I enrolled Dominic in swimming lessons shortly after we returned home. Anyways, last Friday, (the day before we left), Dominic and I headed over to watch Lauren come down. She had asked several times throughout the week if Dominic could go down the slides. Each time I said no. I hadn't thought of asking Dominic until we watched Lauren. To my surprise, he said yes! Okay, now I had a decision to make. Do I let my fear hold him back or do I let him try? Lauren promised me she would be with him the whole time. The lifeguard was also sitting within a foot of the bottom of the slides, so there was not a chance he would drown. I let him go. He came down the slide with no problems at all! When they came over to see me, Lauren asked him if he wanted to go again. He said YES! They went down a few more times.
Even now, with Dominic turning 13 in about four months, I am still guilty of underestimating his abilities. My husband and Lauren have to remind me! I don't know why I still assume he can't do something. Trying is a part of learning, right? I think it's my inner "mamma bear " instincts of wanting to protect my "cubs." I was the "playground police," when Lauren was little to make sure she always got her turn on the swings, etc. Good grief. Looking back, I was pretty overprotective!!! Lauren will be 21 in a few months. As I have watched her grow into an independent and self-confident woman, our relationship has evolved and changed. Ever so often, I catch myself going into that overprotective "mode" with her. Does that feeling of wanting to protect our children ever go away? I am 53 and my dad is still over protective of me, so I guess I just answered my own question!! As Dominic continues to mature and become more independent, I need to loosen those restrictions I don't mean to place on him. I have already taught him what to say to me when I bug him too much. He says, "please just leave me alone." I'm glad he can recognize those times when those pre-adolescent feelings kick in! My relationship with Dominic is starting to change and evolve, just like Lauren and I need to change with it, right???
Wednesday, February 22, 2017
Why I Am Choosing to Talk Openly About My Skin Cancer
I am what you would call "lackadaisical," about using suntan lotion and sunblock. Back in my teenage years, I thought using baby oil would give me that coveted glossy "sheen." I would be that gal on the beach that would be there for hours, with NO umbrella. More than once, I burned my skin so bad that it hurt to sit down. Did I ever think I would get skin cancer? Nope. Did I think I was invincible? Yep. Below is me from the early 1990's when I went to Jamaica. I was red as a lobster.
Well, flash forward to the Summer of 2016. I was at an appointment with my doctor and I showed her a mole on the back of my left calf. She told me at the time it was nothing to worry about, the mole was okay, she didn't suspect skin cancer. Towards the holidays, I began to notice the mole getting larger and changing colors. I was super busy and figured I would ask my doctor to take a look at the mole at my physical in January of 2017. Well, once she took a look, she was like, "Catherine, how long has that mole looked like that?" I said,"oh, a few months." She immediately did a "punch" biopsy and said I would get the results in about a week. I knew when she called me personally, the news was probably not good. It wasn't. She told me I had Malignant Melanoma and I would need to go to the Melanoma Clinic at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor to confirm the diagnosis. I got an appointment a week later and it was confirmed that I have Stage 1B Malignant Melanoma skin cancer. Even as I was sitting in a hospital gown, I still was hoping it was a mistake and I didn't really have skin cancer. During that appointment, I talked to two doctors and they said, "can you come back tomorrow? we will remove the mole." My husband was able to rearrange his schedule to be able to take care of Dominic, and since I was getting a "local," I drove myself there and back. I figured since they removed the mole, and it had only looked strange for a few months, that would be the end of it. I had to wait five business days before I got the results and the doctor who removed the mole called me and told me the cancer was deeper than they originally thought and I would need to see a surgeon to schedule my surgery. Excuse me? When I went to see the surgeon on Valentine's Day, she said, "we shouldn't need to do a skin graft." What??? I already have a one-inch scar from where they removed the mole. My surgery is scheduled for March 23 and I will be getting a "Wide-Local Excision of left calf Melanoma with Intra-Operative Lymphatic Mapping and Sentinel Lymph Node Biopsy." Quite a mouthful, huh? There is a 15 percent chance that the cancer has spread. I haven't felt sorry for myself because all three times I have been to the cancer center, I have seen patients less than half my age in wheelchairs with no hair. I am hoping by being so open about my experiences, if just one person goes to their doctor when they notice a change in a mole, instead of waiting like I did, then hopefully it will spare them having to go through what I am going through now and what I am putting my family and friends through. Consider it a "Public Service Announcement." For more information, visit the American Cancer Society's website: https://www.cancer.org/cancer/melanoma-skin-cancer/detection-diagnosis-staging/signs-and-symptoms.html
Well, flash forward to the Summer of 2016. I was at an appointment with my doctor and I showed her a mole on the back of my left calf. She told me at the time it was nothing to worry about, the mole was okay, she didn't suspect skin cancer. Towards the holidays, I began to notice the mole getting larger and changing colors. I was super busy and figured I would ask my doctor to take a look at the mole at my physical in January of 2017. Well, once she took a look, she was like, "Catherine, how long has that mole looked like that?" I said,"oh, a few months." She immediately did a "punch" biopsy and said I would get the results in about a week. I knew when she called me personally, the news was probably not good. It wasn't. She told me I had Malignant Melanoma and I would need to go to the Melanoma Clinic at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor to confirm the diagnosis. I got an appointment a week later and it was confirmed that I have Stage 1B Malignant Melanoma skin cancer. Even as I was sitting in a hospital gown, I still was hoping it was a mistake and I didn't really have skin cancer. During that appointment, I talked to two doctors and they said, "can you come back tomorrow? we will remove the mole." My husband was able to rearrange his schedule to be able to take care of Dominic, and since I was getting a "local," I drove myself there and back. I figured since they removed the mole, and it had only looked strange for a few months, that would be the end of it. I had to wait five business days before I got the results and the doctor who removed the mole called me and told me the cancer was deeper than they originally thought and I would need to see a surgeon to schedule my surgery. Excuse me? When I went to see the surgeon on Valentine's Day, she said, "we shouldn't need to do a skin graft." What??? I already have a one-inch scar from where they removed the mole. My surgery is scheduled for March 23 and I will be getting a "Wide-Local Excision of left calf Melanoma with Intra-Operative Lymphatic Mapping and Sentinel Lymph Node Biopsy." Quite a mouthful, huh? There is a 15 percent chance that the cancer has spread. I haven't felt sorry for myself because all three times I have been to the cancer center, I have seen patients less than half my age in wheelchairs with no hair. I am hoping by being so open about my experiences, if just one person goes to their doctor when they notice a change in a mole, instead of waiting like I did, then hopefully it will spare them having to go through what I am going through now and what I am putting my family and friends through. Consider it a "Public Service Announcement." For more information, visit the American Cancer Society's website: https://www.cancer.org/cancer/melanoma-skin-cancer/detection-diagnosis-staging/signs-and-symptoms.html
Thursday, January 19, 2017
A Recipe with a "Story"
Back in August of last year, I flew back to Maryland for part of a week and helped my brother start to clean out my parents house to get it ready to sell. I had my brother store some boxes for me at his house and when we were just in Maryland around the holidays, we put them in the back of our van and brought them back to Michigan. One of the boxes contained two of my mother's recipe boxes. Shortly after the new year, I took a quick look through the boxes and then didn't look through them again until a few days ago. Oh my, I found a recipe card for a cookie that I thought I had in my "collection," but didn't. Growing up, there was a couple that lived next door to my family that had no children. Their names were Mary Ann and Harold. Even though we weren't related, they were like family to us. Finding Mary Ann's recipe for "Mom D's Cinnamon Crisps," was like hitting the jackpot!!! I have been looking for this cookie recipe for years and thought it was gone forever. It was written in my handwriting on a pink recipe card. I am pretty sure "Mom D." was Mary Ann's mom. When I was in eighth grade and taking a Home Economics class, I brought this recipe to school and we made these cookies in the classroom! Mary Ann and Harold moved to Iowa after Harold retired. I was lucky enough to visit them a few times in Iowa. They both have been gone a long time, more years than I care to remember, but I still think about them frequently. This is one of the few pictures I have of Mary Ann and I.
Below is the recipe for "Mom D's Cinnamon Crisps," if you would like to make them.They are really yummy!
Ingredients:
3 ounces cream cheese, softened
1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened
1/2 cup shortening
1 cup white sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups sifted flour
2 tablespoons white sugar (reserved)
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon (reserved)
Preheat oven to 350 degrees and put a piece of parchment paper on a cookie sheet. Set aside. In a large bowl, put the cream cheese, butter, shortening and sugar. Cream by hand with a large spoon or with an electric mixer until light and fluffy. Add the vanilla and the flour a half a cup at a time until well combined. Roll into 36 equal-sized balls and place a dozen at a time on the cookie sheet. In a small bowl, put the reserved tablespoons of white sugar and cinnamon and mix with a small spoon until well combined. Using the bottom of a small drinking glass, press first in the sugar/cinnamon mixture and then press down gently on the cookie. Bake for about 12 minutes or until slightly brown and then remove from oven. Let them sit five minutes before removing to a wire rack to continue cooling.
I like what I wrote on the back of the recipe card, "these are terrific and melt in your mouth!" Well they do!!
Below is the recipe for "Mom D's Cinnamon Crisps," if you would like to make them.They are really yummy!
Ingredients:
3 ounces cream cheese, softened
1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened
1/2 cup shortening
1 cup white sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups sifted flour
2 tablespoons white sugar (reserved)
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon (reserved)
Preheat oven to 350 degrees and put a piece of parchment paper on a cookie sheet. Set aside. In a large bowl, put the cream cheese, butter, shortening and sugar. Cream by hand with a large spoon or with an electric mixer until light and fluffy. Add the vanilla and the flour a half a cup at a time until well combined. Roll into 36 equal-sized balls and place a dozen at a time on the cookie sheet. In a small bowl, put the reserved tablespoons of white sugar and cinnamon and mix with a small spoon until well combined. Using the bottom of a small drinking glass, press first in the sugar/cinnamon mixture and then press down gently on the cookie. Bake for about 12 minutes or until slightly brown and then remove from oven. Let them sit five minutes before removing to a wire rack to continue cooling.
I like what I wrote on the back of the recipe card, "these are terrific and melt in your mouth!" Well they do!!
Tuesday, January 3, 2017
Maintaining a "Connection"
Lauren starts her second semester of her junior year of college this coming Monday! Good grief. That went by SO fast. In the "olden," days (when I was 20), there was no such thing as texting and Skyping to keep connected with family and friends. The "twenty-somethings," of today rely on texting, Snapchatting, etc. I think one of the happiest days of Lauren's life was when I FINALLY decided to ditch my TracFone!!! Yes, I now use an iPhone. Anyways, her winter break has been long and with the hubby and Dominic both going back to work and school today, respectfully, we decided to head out to the local outlet mall. I am so lucky that Lauren still values my opinion and I can be truthful with her. We hit three or four different stores and since the holidays are over, the parking lot/stores were pretty much empty. We got some really, really great deals. Lauren wants to go to law school after she graduates in 2018, so we were over the moon when we found a designer dress that was 60% off! She wants to "intern," and we are working on building a wardrobe full of professional clothes. I think my favorite conversations with Lauren today were on the 1/2 hour drive to and from the outlet mall. We rarely have "alone," time and I really miss that. I treasure those moments when I have her all to myself, because they are so rare. Thanks my sweet girl for an awesome afternoon!
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