Investing the Time Now to Prepare for the Future

When the Quarantine first started, I spent the first week trying to replicate what Dominic did at school on a daily basis and unfortunately, he had a seizure that Friday, March 20. The next week, I let him do whatever he wanted because I had a huge case of mom “guilt” that I had caused it. Secretly, in the back of my mind, I was hoping the Quarantine would last two weeks and things could go back to the way they were. As we all know, that hasn’t happened yet (at least here in Michigan). The third week, I started using a whiteboard for Dominic’s detailed “schedule” as well as having him write his daily chores in a spiral notebook. Dominic has had a handful of chores for well over a year now (a fabulous idea from his private speech therapist), but what I began to notice, is that I was starting to give him additional chores, many of them life skills that he will be able to carry with him throughout his life, whether he always lives with us or not. Some of his new chores include making his own lunch (he has been making his own breakfast for several years) and bringing in the trashcan from the curb after the garbage guys come through. I gladly let him take that one over from me! Dominic has been baking along side me from the time he was in diapers. Before the Quarantine, I was so incredibly busy, that baking had really taken a “backseat.” I was hardly doing ANY baking. During this time of togetherness, I have started it up again! Dominic used to just put the ingredients in a bowl and leave. I have “expanded” his role to reading the recipe, as well as finding and measuring the ingredients. A few weeks ago, he spilled a bunch of flour and got upset.

He is what you would call a “perfectionist.” I had to reassure him several times it was okay. So far, we have made my mother-in-law’s Sour Cream Kuchen four times, as well as Brownie Pie and yesterday, Sour Cream Biscotti!

My great-grandfather was a baker in Missouri. I have LOVED baking since I got my first Easy Bake Oven. I think Dominic has inherited his great-great grandfather’s passion for baking. Dominic will be 16 in July. He is on the life skills “track” at school, not the academic “track.” Employment for those with disabilities is hard to find. I don’t know the exact statistic, but I do know the number is quite low. I see SO many stories on social media about those with disabilities working in coffee shops, restaurants, etc. Dominic loves repetition and organization. Throughout my volunteering with the disability community, I have met the most remarkable woman who I have the utmost respect for. She took over as the President and CEO of the Greater Lansing Convention and Visitors Bureau right around the time the Quarantine started. I have watched her handle this crisis like a pro. It makes me even respect her more (if that's possible). When I sent her a draft of this blog post her words to me were, "with Dominic's winning smile, he's perfect for the hospitality industry!" Thank you Julie for having such a positive influence on Dominic!

Presume Competence

Since we have traveled outside of the United States since Dominic was very small, we have had to get him a Children's Passport every five years. Since his current one expires in February of 2024 and he is now 19, we had to apply for an Adult Passport. I don't know why my husband and I picked Dominic's first day of school and Michigan State University moving in their students, but the appointment was yesterady at 3 p.m. We had gathered all of the documents needed and then went into a special room in the East Lansing Post Office just for Passports. The three of us sat down and the clerk asked Dominic his age. He said, "19." Since we were also getting his picture taken for the Passport, he went into a separate room, where she took a picture of him and then let him look at it to make sure he liked it (it will be his picture for the next 10 years)! He said he did, so he sat back down with us. The clerk filled out a bit more of the paperwork and then she let Dominic s

Why We Pursued Guardianship of our Son with Autism

Last Thursday morning, my husband, Dominic and I went to our county's Probate Court and had Dominic's Guardianship Hearing. My husband and I are Co-Guardians, and we were granted "Partial Guardianship," which means Dominic can make some of his own decisions (future educational and vocational placement options, what to wear and how he wants to spend his free time), but my husband and I will make his medical, health care, legal, contractual and major financial decisions. The subject of Guardianship in the disability "world" has been and continues to be a controversial and divisive topic. I was a panelist for an Autism Conference this past summer and presented on what it's like to have a child with Autism. Towards the end of my presentation, I mentioned that Dominic had just turned 18 and that we were going through the Guardianship process. When the attendees could ask questions, the first person that went up to the microphone started telling me that I was

Those "Steps" to Independence Can Be Hard

We are heading towards 600 orders for Dominic's business. Since our long-term goal for Baked Goods By Dominic is having a "brick-and-mortar" and hire those with disabilities, it is essential and imperative that I continue to teach him all parts of the business. Since I prompted Dominic for so many years for speech, he has become "prompt dependent." What that essentially means is that he will look at me for a prompt, like, "what do you do next?" I do that one a lot. Dominic has been going to a private speech therapist for over ten years and she reminds me often that Dominic usually will know the answer, if I am patient and wait for him. That has been a very hard habit to break! Dominic has an incredible memory, so I put it to the test this morning. I didn't write out the steps, I wanted to see how much he could do completely on his own. We have a customer picking up his order today, but the only thing that had been done is putting the cookies into t

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