Thursday, April 28, 2016
Give the Opportunity
In the Fall of 2015, I took Dominic along with me to a local horse farm to meet the owner. It was a relatively quick visit, but I think it made a big impression on him. This past Sunday, we went back to the horse farm because I wanted to plan some events for the two non-profit organizations I volunteer for. The owner of the horse farm having met Dominic once before, remembered how anxious and wound up he got around the dogs, so she had put her dogs in the backyard of her house where there was a fence. Pretty incredibly thoughtful, don't you think? At one point during our visit, I started to scold Dominic because I thought he was taunting the dogs. I soon figured out that he was playing with them - Dominic would come to the fence and three of the dogs would start barking and then he would run to the other end of the fence and the dogs would run with him! It was a beautiful day and Dominic went in and out of the barn (where he fed a horse out of the palm of his hand), walked around the farm, basically had the run of the place.
Every so often a cat would walk by. In the past, let's just say cats and Dominic have not been a good "mix." He's never had an experience that I can recall which would make him so afraid, I'm guessing that it's because they are unpredictable and Dominic THRIVES on predictability. More and more, I have been hearing that animals are a good "fit," for adults and children with special needs and for those with anxiety and depression. There is definitely something comforting and soothing about petting an animal. Anyways, I figured Dominic would be ready to go within a half hour or so, based on our first visit last fall. That was definitely not the case this time! Since we ended up at the farm for almost two hours, it was very, "eye-opening," watching how Dominic went from trying to shoo the black cat off the steps to petting her, not just for a little bit, but A LOT!
As it got closer to dinner time, I told Dominic we needed to go. We went inside the owner's house briefly and at first he was a little apprehensive because she had about three or four cats milling around inside her house. Dominic sat down on the couch and the owner said something like, "would you like to learn how to hold a cat?" I thought he would say, "no, thank you," but he didn't! She showed him how and then he picked one up! Wow, to go from being terrified and very skittish to holding a cat? Dominic then moved to a chair and would you believe those same three or four cats came over to him and were vying for his attention?!?!?! I told the owner of the farm that Dominic was the "cat whisperer." It's been nine years since we got the diagnosis of Autism for Dominic. Even after all this time, I am still guilty of thinking he can't do something. Boy, did I learn my "lesson," this past Sunday. I need to give him at least the opportunity to be open to new experiences, because if I don't, then I am doing a real disservice to him.
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