I had to leave my own family this week to help my mom recover from some surgery. This is the third time this year that I have had to leave the hubby in charge of running the household in my absence. I am so detailed oriented that I spent almost 2 hours typing up a single spaced 2-page "itinerary" for him to follow before I left. When I was typing it up before I left he was like, "we don't need that, we'll be fine!" I have an incredible support system of friends that help take care of my husband and kids when I'm gone and make it possible for me to be able to leave. One of my friends is making my family a meal to enjoy, another mom said, "I've got your back." Other friends have sent e-mails, letting me know that they are thinking of me. I've always been this person that when people have offered to help I would always say, "no, that's okay, I have it covered." As I've reached the ripe old age of 48, I've realized that you do need other moms to help you. I always thought that I could do it all. As my own parents age, I know that I will be needed more and I want to be able to help them. They helped raise me, I want to be there to help them when they need me. I guess this is what is called the "Sandwich Generation." I've heard that term before. It is kind of accurate, you're "in between" two families the way a filling is in between two pieces of bread. I'm a mom that is raising children and also helping my parents at the same time. I helped my hubby with his parents, he was an only child. I watched him take care of both of his parents, I feel extremely lucky that I got to know my in-laws so well. My father-in-law has been gone more than 6 years now and my mother-in-law just since January. I still miss them a lot. So many of my friends my age are part of that "sandwich." A lot of people are living longer, my grandfather lived to over 90, my grandmother was 101! I feel blessed that I still have both of my parents. I am getting to know them on a totally different level than when I was growing up, though I still can't call my dad by his first name! I thought that when I became an adult I could that. My stepson likes to try and call his dad by his first name, even my daughter and son try. But, he doesn't like it either :) I know that I can't predict what the future will hold. Nobody can. My goal for the future is to try and be the best wife, mother, stepmother, daughter, sister, niece, aunt, cousin and friend that I can be!
When Dominic was diagnosed with Autism at 2 1/2, I went to our local library and took out every book I could find about Autism. Sometimes I would bring back 20 books. This was 2006, so a lot of the information was very "dated." I guess I was looking for a book that would tell me what I should do next, like a "manual." Autism doesn't quite work that way! The saying is, " if you know one person with Autism, you know one person with Autism." Every mom to an individual with Autism follows their own "path." I think as moms, we judge ourselves much harder than anyone else does. I was 41 when I had Dominic. Did he get the diagnosis of Autism because I was an older mom? because I drank a lot of pop? I could sit and think about that every minute of every day. I am pretty integrated into the Autism community around Lansing and have told more than one person that it took me about two weeks to come to terms with Dominic's diagnosis. It is so incredib...
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