A Mom is ALWAYS Prepared!

In the Fall of 2014, I started co-teaching a religious education class. During one of the classes recently, as I was reading a portion of the lesson, I heard one of the little boys in the class say, "my finger is bleeding!" About half the class went over to "investigate," and everything came to a grinding halt. His finger definitely needed a Band-Aid, so I told him. "hold on, let me check my purse!" He was like, "purse?" Sure enough, within seconds, I had located one and quickly put it on his finger. I think he was glad I was prepared! Since it took us until Dominic was over eight years old to get him potty trained, I always had a diaper or a Pull-Up on me at all times. Even though Lauren is now an adult, she has been known on more than one occasion to say, "mom, do you have anything to eat in your purse?" I don't cart around a three course meal in there, but I do make sure I have at least one granola bar! Sometimes I still wish I carried a diaper bag, because you could put all kinds of stuff in there. While smaller purses are cute, I often wondered, where would a mom with kids out of diapers put things her kids might need?!?! You can only fit so much in a pocket! I have tried carrying a smaller purse, but it just didn't feel like, "me." I guess I'm just one of those gals that likes a big purse! My family and I traveled back to Maryland for the holidays and we stayed the entire time at my parents house. One of the days we were there, I was searching for Dominic's medication and literally turned their house upside down trying to find it! My dad was watching me and I think he was wondering what the heck I was doing. I had already checked my purse once, but decided maybe I should look again. Guess what? The medication was in there! Good grief. Wouldn't it be great if our children came with an "owner's" manual? That's unrealistic because each child is different! According to Dictionary.com, prepared means, "properly expectant, organized or equipped; ready." As moms, aren't we always ready for anything? If your child falls down and scrapes their knee, don't we always have a hug or a kiss available to wipe away the tears? I have been known to give another mom a Kleenex when her child has a runny nose. When we are preparing to travel in the car for hours, I pack up a "snack bag" full of pretzels, etc. Sometimes, we don't even make it out of our neighborhood, before Dominic or Lauren will say, "I'm hungry!" From a very young age, I guess I've had the "mom" instinct. I loved my "dollies," when I was little and I tried to always "mother" them. My own mom was a stay-at-home mom for a long time and I knew that I always wanted to be one too. Yesterday, Dominic and I made some homemade pumpkin muffins because two of Lauren's friends were coming over to our house to visit and I know they like them. Later in the evening, Lauren was seeing two of her former "cheer" buddies. I put together a plate of muffins and told Lauren to give them to her friends. I wrote a little note on top and said, "Love, Mom "B." I am always "prepared" to share my love of baking!

Those "Steps" to Independence Can Be Hard

We are heading towards 600 orders for Dominic's business. Since our long-term goal for Baked Goods By Dominic is having a "brick-and-mortar" and hire those with disabilities, it is essential and imperative that I continue to teach him all parts of the business. Since I prompted Dominic for so many years for speech, he has become "prompt dependent." What that essentially means is that he will look at me for a prompt, like, "what do you do next?" I do that one a lot. Dominic has been going to a private speech therapist for over ten years and she reminds me often that Dominic usually will know the answer, if I am patient and wait for him. That has been a very hard habit to break! Dominic has an incredible memory, so I put it to the test this morning. I didn't write out the steps, I wanted to see how much he could do completely on his own. We have a customer picking up his order today, but the only thing that had been done is putting the cookies into t...

Why We Pursued Guardianship of our Son with Autism

Last Thursday morning, my husband, Dominic and I went to our county's Probate Court and had Dominic's Guardianship Hearing. My husband and I are Co-Guardians, and we were granted "Partial Guardianship," which means Dominic can make some of his own decisions (future educational and vocational placement options, what to wear and how he wants to spend his free time), but my husband and I will make his medical, health care, legal, contractual and major financial decisions. The subject of Guardianship in the disability "world" has been and continues to be a controversial and divisive topic. I was a panelist for an Autism Conference this past summer and presented on what it's like to have a child with Autism. Towards the end of my presentation, I mentioned that Dominic had just turned 18 and that we were going through the Guardianship process. When the attendees could ask questions, the first person that went up to the microphone started telling me that I was...

Presume Competence

Since we have traveled outside of the United States since Dominic was very small, we have had to get him a Children's Passport every five years. Since his current one expires in February of 2024 and he is now 19, we had to apply for an Adult Passport. I don't know why my husband and I picked Dominic's first day of school and Michigan State University moving in their students, but the appointment was yesterady at 3 p.m. We had gathered all of the documents needed and then went into a special room in the East Lansing Post Office just for Passports. The three of us sat down and the clerk asked Dominic his age. He said, "19." Since we were also getting his picture taken for the Passport, he went into a separate room, where she took a picture of him and then let him look at it to make sure he liked it (it will be his picture for the next 10 years)! He said he did, so he sat back down with us. The clerk filled out a bit more of the paperwork and then she let Dominic s...

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