I rarely watch afternoon talk shows past 2:30 p.m., usually because I'm shuttling the kids around somewhere. I happened to be watching Anderson Cooper's talk show this past Tuesday and they had a panel of people on talking about moms who need medication for anxiety or depression to help them care for their children. I found it kind of fascinating, because they had two moms sitting side-by-side. One mom has been taking medication on and off for several years (since before she had children) and the other mom was totally against medication. On Anderson Cooper's show, people were tweeting in and giving their opinions. Wow, one person tweeted something along the lines of, "if you need medication to help with your kids, you aren't a very good mom." How incredibly judgmental. I read Brooke Shields book called, Down Came the Rain: My Journey Through Postpartum Depression, shortly after it came out. The actor Tom Cruise went on the Today Show around the same time and basically said there was no such thing as postpartum depression. Excuse me, but has he ever given birth?? Does he understand the hormones and everything else birth entails? I don't think so. He said that she could be helped without medication by exercising and taking vitamins. Pardon me, is he a doctor, psychologist or psychiatrist? Last time I checked, I don't think he is. For some moms, they need to take medication or get therapy to help them cope. I don't think it's up to others to judge. It's a good mom that reaches out to her friends, partner, husband or doctor with her concerns if something doesn't feel quite right (even if your kids are older). Don't be ashamed or embarrassed for asking questions or getting a referral to see a psychologist or psychiatrist. It's okay to ask for help from others. Please, please don't judge other moms unless you have walked in their shoes. Instead, let's support each other.
When Dominic was diagnosed with Autism at 2 1/2, I went to our local library and took out every book I could find about Autism. Sometimes I would bring back 20 books. This was 2006, so a lot of the information was very "dated." I guess I was looking for a book that would tell me what I should do next, like a "manual." Autism doesn't quite work that way! The saying is, " if you know one person with Autism, you know one person with Autism." Every mom to an individual with Autism follows their own "path." I think as moms, we judge ourselves much harder than anyone else does. I was 41 when I had Dominic. Did he get the diagnosis of Autism because I was an older mom? because I drank a lot of pop? I could sit and think about that every minute of every day. I am pretty integrated into the Autism community around Lansing and have told more than one person that it took me about two weeks to come to terms with Dominic's diagnosis. It is so incredib...
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