We are super blessed that Dominic is talking and even though he is behind with his speech, 95% of the time he can communicate to us what he wants and needs. Being able to answer the "why" questions still present a huge challenge for him. While most of the time I have tons of patience with Dominic, I sometimes have those times when I hit my limit. About six weeks or so ago, after being fully trained with the potty training for several months, he decided that he was all done. He started having accidents and lots of anxiety. I have been down this road with him before, but it was after he had a migraine. That was not the case this time, so I was more than a little perplexed. The more I pushed, the more he resisted. Potty training is all about the control, right?? It reached the point that I was almost ready to put him back in diapers (yes, I was THAT frustrated). I relayed my concerns to Dominic's teacher at school and he made a picture schedule that helped. Last week, when I was having lunch with a close friend, I was telling her about how frustrated I was with Dominic that he couldn't tell me "why" he was resisting the potty training so much. She looked right at me and said, "he probably doesn't know." Hmm, that sure put things back into perspective for me! What a wise friend I have :) The whole potty training "road" we have been on with Dominic has definitely been a long and bumpy one. I think the first time we introduced the concept to him was when he was around three years old. He is now over 9 1/2. When a typically developing child masters potty training, it's done and you move on. With Dominic, I liken it to a roller coaster ride, it's been up, down and round and round, with seemingly no end. I finally came to the conclusion that if I didn't make a big deal out of it, he had less anxiety. I was like, "okay, whatever, do it or don't do it." The "reverse psychology" approach seems to be working (at least for now). Once he lets us know "why" he has such issues with the toilet training, my next question for Dominic is "why" does he have such a fascination with his nose?!?!?!!
When Dominic was diagnosed with Autism at 2 1/2, I went to our local library and took out every book I could find about Autism. Sometimes I would bring back 20 books. This was 2006, so a lot of the information was very "dated." I guess I was looking for a book that would tell me what I should do next, like a "manual." Autism doesn't quite work that way! The saying is, " if you know one person with Autism, you know one person with Autism." Every mom to an individual with Autism follows their own "path." I think as moms, we judge ourselves much harder than anyone else does. I was 41 when I had Dominic. Did he get the diagnosis of Autism because I was an older mom? because I drank a lot of pop? I could sit and think about that every minute of every day. I am pretty integrated into the Autism community around Lansing and have told more than one person that it took me about two weeks to come to terms with Dominic's diagnosis. It is so incredib...
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